Well, it's been a while since the last post, a result of both laziness and busyness, if that is possible. But, I'm posting, so it's all good. I've had some breakthroughs in the novels, thickening plot, solidifying things, although I need to work some more on the geography, but all in good time.
Alright, here we go, an excerpt from my novel. Tell me what you think.
Growls. Glowing red. Teeth ripping...tearing. Blood everywhere. Splashing...suffocating...water flooding my lungs, choking me to death. Thick blanketing darkness. Crushing dread. Nothing.
Light, slowly pulsating ghostly light swims around me and hope sparks in my shattered, exhausted mind as I frantically claw for the surface. The smooth circle of glowing liquid breaks and waves splash gently onto the rune-etched edge. I grope my way out of the pool, retching the water from my lungs and gasping for breath. Waves of dizziness and nausea sweep through my skull and my blood streaked face slowly falls to the glowing runes, my consciousness fading rapidly. But none of this matters. I'm alive, oh God, I'm alive.
Is the narrative told from the perspective of this one character or are there others?
ReplyDeleteHave you considered turning this into a poem?
Your writing style seems tailor-made for it :)
Related to this, have you read "A Game of Thrones" by George R. R. Martin?
Opening sequence comes from his point of view, rest is third person, with many different characters. Nope, never considered poem, as this is only a sliver of a much bigger thing. Lol, funny you say that, seeing as I can no longer write poetry. Nope, haven't read it, what's it like?
ReplyDelete"A Song of Ice and Fire" is the cycle, and it's very good, very full on fantasy (not for the faint of heart). As for what you said, is this an example of something we can expect at the beginning of each chapter?
ReplyDeleteOr is this first-person section just a one-off?
I'm sure we can look forward to the main text as an ensemble cast (such as what you describe) can be a great reward, despite complexity.
One more thing that occured to me - your character says "Oh God, I'm alive." I'm wondering, being a fantasy story, will you explore why he says "God" and the religion behind it? World building aside, I learnt that you should keep track of these things - they can bite you back later.
Okay, don't think I'll end up reading it (I actually read very little fantasy) but if I'm in the mood I might.
ReplyDeleteThis is perspective will be taken on numerous occasions, but I'm not saying when. Otherwise, it is all third person description and narrative.
I put that in after great deliberation actually. There isn't an exploration of God and religion, but it serves a purpose, of which I can say no more without giving away possible developments. But, yes, I only wrote that after much thought, as much as I hate actually using it. To be real, there has to be something to hate, that happens to be one of the things I hate...but yeah.